A few years ago I was on the precipice of a major burnout. Not only was I drinking myself in to a precarious physical state, but mentally I was in trouble. I was up to my eyeballs in anxiety and the overwhelming feeling that I was doing it wrong, on every front, was eating me alive. It wasn’t until I took a good, long, hard look at my behaviors that I realized that I needed to “flip my magnet” from grinding to surrendering.

In a world that glorifies hustle culture and the grind mentality, it’s easy to get caught up in the idea that success only comes to those who relentlessly push themselves to the limit. However, what if I told you that you can still achieve your goals without burning yourself out? What if there’s a way to invite more ease and flow into your life while still pursuing your dreams with passion and dedication?

The concept of “less grind, more shine” embodies this idea perfectly. It’s about finding a balance between putting in the necessary effort and allowing things to unfold naturally. It’s about recognizing that while hard work is important, so is surrendering to the universe and trusting that it has your best interests at heart.

Loosen Your Grip.

You can still want it – whatever “it” may be for you – and be willing to put in the hours and the energy to make it happen. There’s nothing wrong with having goals and aspirations, but it’s equally important to loosen your grip and allow room for magic to happen. The universe responds to openness and faith, rewarding those who trust in its infinite wisdom.

So, how do we embrace this mindset of less grind and more receiving?

Shift Perspective.

First and foremost, it requires a shift in perspective. Instead of constantly striving and pushing against resistance, try approaching your goals with a sense of ease and flow. Trust that the universe is conspiring in your favor and that everything is unfolding exactly as it should.

This doesn’t mean sitting back and waiting for success to magically appear. It means taking inspired action – following your intuition and doing what feels right in the moment, rather than forcing things to happen according to your timeline.

Let Go.

It also involves letting go of the need to control every outcome. Understand that there may be detours and setbacks along the way, but each of these is an opportunity for growth and learning. By releasing attachment to specific outcomes, you open yourself up to a world of infinite possibilities.

Practice Gratitude + Mindfulness.

Moreover, practicing gratitude and mindfulness can help cultivate a sense of abundance and receptivity. Take time each day to acknowledge the blessings in your life and to tune into the present moment. When you approach life with a grateful heart, you attract more things to be grateful for.

Ultimately, embracing the concept of less grind and more receiving is about finding harmony between action and surrender. It’s about working smart rather than just working hard, and trusting that the universe has your back every step of the way.

So, the next time you find yourself caught up in the hustle and bustle of life, take a moment to pause and remind yourself that it’s okay to ease up and let things unfold naturally. Remember that the universe responds to openness and faith, and that by loosening your grip, you invite abundance and blessings into your life.

How many times have asked yourself: “Why can’t I just get my shit together?” Well, you’re in good company if you have. I am in my mid-forties and there are days where I just cannot seem to adult. Where I feel like EVERYONE else has their shit together and I’m just over here thrilled I washed my hair.

This happens less now that I’m not hungover everyday, but the question still rears its ugly head now and then. When it happens I try to think of this acronym. It helps…sometimes.

Sometimes I just go back to bed.

S. is for Self-Care

We know self-care is often tossed around like it’s all about spa days and sipping wine but it’s way deeper than that. It’s not about just indulging in little luxuries although those can definitely help. Real self-care for women in their thirties, forties and beyond is about being mindful of your choices.

I hate to burst the bubble bath fantasy, but genuine self-care means learning to say “no” more often than saying “yes.” It’s about setting those boundaries, prioritizing what truly matters, (I’ve got a solution for that) and not overloading yourself with unnecessary commitments. You’ve got to protect your time like a squirrel guarding its nuts.

And you know what else? It’s about sitting with your feelings, not numbing them out. Life gets real, and it’s okay to feel the ups and downs. Instead of pushing those emotions aside, embrace them. Take a moment to reflect and understand what you’re going through. That’s where the real strength lies.

So, let’s redefine self-care for you – it’s not just about pampering, it’s about making choices that nurture your well-being, saying no when you need to, facing your emotions head-on, and fiercely protecting your time like the queen you are.

H. is for Happiness

I totally understand if you had a bit of an eye-roll to the cliché of “Happiness is a journey, not a destination.” It’s an overused phrase, but there’s a reason for that – it’s actually quite profound. Hear me out.

Happiness isn’t this fixed, ultimate goal you reach and then everything is sunshine and rainbows forever. Instead, it’s this dynamic, ever-changing state of being. Sometimes you’re in that happy zone, and other times, well, life throws curveballs.

Life is this intricate tapestry of emotions, and they’re all part of the journey. Happiness is about finding contentment, joy, and gratitude in the little moments, even when there are challenges and irritations along the way. It’s about learning to navigate through the ups and downs with resilience.

So, while the phrase may sound a bit worn out, its truth lies in the idea that happiness isn’t a destination you arrive at, but a continuous journey you embark upon, embracing all the emotions and experiences that come your way. It’s a journey unique to you, full of twists and turns, and that’s what makes it beautiful and real.

I. is for Inner Peace

Knowing yourself is like the foundation of this whole happiness thing. It’s embarking on a bit of self-discovery excavation, and let’s be honest, it’s not always a walk in the park.

First things first, it involves some serious introspection, what we call the “S. work” from above. It’s about diving deep into your values, the core principles that define who you are and what you stand for. What really matters to you? What makes you feel fulfilled, safe, and secure? Understanding these aspects of yourself is like holding a compass in the maze of life.

But here’s the kicker – it’s not just about knowing yourself; it’s about deciding who gets access to you and your life. Setting boundaries, deciding who you allow in, and who you keep at arm’s length, that’s where the real challenge comes in. It’s like protecting your own sanctuary, your own well-being.

Is it simple? In concept, yes. But is it easy? Fuck no. It’s a process that can be messy, uncomfortable, and sometimes downright shitty. It means making tough choices, letting go of toxic influences, and standing up for your own needs and values, even when it’s not the popular or easy thing to do.

Getting to a place where you can truly be happy and content involves a lot of self-work, understanding your values, and fiercely protecting what matters to you. It’s a journey that can be challenging, but it’s also incredibly rewarding because it’s about creating a life that authentically reflects who you are.

T. is for Time

Time is one of the most precious and finite resources we have. For the people in the back: TIME IS FINITE. It’s a stark truth that our lives do have an endpoint, and yet, many of us tend to treat time as if it’s an infinite commodity. This realization requires some deep soul-searching.

Reflecting on how we’re truly spending our time is like holding up a mirror to our lives. It’s about being brutally honest with ourselves. Every action we take, every moment we spend, serves some purpose for us. It’s not about labeling things as a “waste” of time, but rather understanding the intention behind our choices.

Sometimes, we engage in activities that may seem like they’re wasting time, but they’re actually serving as a form of escapism or a numbing agent. It’s like using these actions to distract ourselves from something deeper or to avoid facing certain emotions or responsibilities. This is where the soul-searching comes into play – asking ourselves why we’re doing what we’re doing.

On the other hand, intentional rest and downtime are crucial for our well-being. These moments serve as necessary pit stops in our journey through life. It’s about recognizing when we genuinely need a break to recharge and when we’re just using activities as a way to avoid addressing what’s truly important.

Time is a limited and precious resource, and it’s vital to be mindful of how we’re spending it. It’s not about judgment but rather about understanding our intentions and making choices that align with our values and genuine needs. It’s about living our lives with purpose and authenticity.

Self-care, far from just spa days and wine, involves mastering the art of “no,” diving into your feelings’ abyss, and guarding your time like a bear mama. As for happiness being a journey, it’s cliché, but life’s a rollercoaster, and eye rolls are part of the ride. Knowing yourself? Well, it’s a bit like figuring out your least favorite relative at a family reunion – messy, uncomfortable, but essential for setting boundaries. And time, oh, that precious thing, it’s slipping away, but Netflix binges aren’t necessarily a waste – just be honest with your Instagram habits. Life’s a bit like folding a fitted sheet, not always neat, but uniquely yours. So, embrace it all with humor, sarcasm, and authenticity; it’s your one-of-a-kind journey, after all.

I had my midlife crisis pretty early according to the standard age. Such an over-achiever . My father-in-law died unexpectedly at the age of 59 (I was 38) and so began the unraveling of my pretty life. I’m happy to say I put myself back together again, but it took some time, energy and self-discovery.

As we navigate through the various stages of life, we often encounter moments of introspection and self-reflection. One common phenomenon that we experience is often referred to as a “midlife crisis.” This is not uncommon after the death of someone as close as a parent but there are many other situations that have us questioning our purpose here; empty nests, career and work changes, relationship shifts, infidelity, traumatic accidents or revelations, etc. But it also doesn’t have to be anything dramatic. Age can simply be the reason we start questioning our existence. It’s essential to delve deeper into this concept to understand whether it’s genuinely a crisis or simply a natural part of the human journey…which by the way doesn’t make it any easier.

Defining a Midlife Crisis

The concept of a midlife crisis has been ingrained in popular culture, often portrayed as a time when individuals suddenly feel discontented, question their life choices, contemplate significant changes, buy a red sports car or cut their bangs.

Factors Contributing to Midlife Reflection (<<<such a nice way to put it)

Several factors contribute to the sense of reflection and contemplation that individuals may experience during middle adulthood. These factors can include:

1. Life Milestones: Middle adulthood often coincides with reaching significant life milestones, such as career peaks, children leaving home, marriage/relationship milestones, and aging parents. Not surprisingly, these events may prompt individuals to question and reevaluate their goals and aspirations. This can be a very confusing time where we feel like we’ve ‘checked all the boxes’ of adult life but still feel unfulfilled.

2. Mortality Awareness: As people age, they become more aware of their mortality. This increased awareness can lead to a reassessment of life priorities and a desire to make the most of the time remaining. The aging or death of parents and in-laws, friends whose lives were cut short by accident or illness, the unexplainable loss of young people can all contribute to the questions of:

  • Who am I really?

  • Why {not} me?

  • Why am I here?

3. Identity and Purpose: Questions about one’s identity and life purpose can become more pronounced during middle adulthood. Individuals may find themselves questioning whether they have fulfilled their potential and whether their current path aligns with their true selves. This is the perfect time for redefining values, reassessing relationships and rediscovering wants and needs.

Crisis or Transformation?

While the term “midlife crisis” suggests a negative connotation, it’s essential to recognize that this period is a time of positive transformation and growth. Instead of viewing it solely as a crisis, reframe it as an opportunity for self-discovery, renewal, and the pursuit of new passions.

Tips for Navigating Midlife Reflection

Self-Reflection: Take time to reflect on your values, goals, and aspirations. Consider whether your current path aligns with your authentic self. {I have a ton of tools if you like homework. Happy to send…shoot me an email.}

Seek Support: Talk to friends, family, or a hire a midlife coach if you’re feeling overwhelmed. Sharing your thoughts and feelings can provide valuable insights and support. {Coaching is somewhere between a supportive friend and a therapist, but neither of those things. Here’s the difference.}

Embrace Change: Instead of fearing change, view it as an opportunity for personal and professional growth. Be open to exploring new interests and pursuing meaningful experiences.

The notion of a midlife crisis is a complex and multifaceted phenomenon that varies from person to person. Whether it’s a crisis or a natural phase of reflection, middle adulthood can be a transformative period and dare I say, fun. Embracing the opportunity for self-discovery and growth can lead to a more fulfilling and purposeful life in the years ahead.

Need someone to listen? No obligation to continue with coaching…just an opportunity to get it out.

I love me some shelf-helpery.

I have a thing about listening to only self-development books on Audible and also reading them in print simultaneously. Many of the books below I’ve listened to or read multiple times. If you have other suggestions, please let me know!

  1. You’re a Badass by Jen Sincero

In this refreshingly entertaining guide to reshaping your mindset and your life, mega-bestselling author and world-traveling success coach Jen Sincero serves up 27 bite-sized chapters full of hilarious and inspiring stories, sage advice, loving yet firm kicks in the rear, and easy-to-implement exercises to help you: Identify and change the self-sabotaging beliefs and behaviors that stop you from getting what you want. Shift your energy and attract what you desire. Create a life you totally love. And start creating it NOW. Make some damn money already. The kind you’ve never made before. By the end of You Are a Badass, you’ll understand how to blast past what’s holding you back, make some serious changes, and start living the kind of life that once seemed impossible.

2. Go Giver and Go Givers Sell More by Bob Burg and John David Mann

The Go-Giver tells the story of an ambitious young man named Joe who yearns for success. Joe is a true go-getter, though sometimes he feels as if the harder and faster he works, the further away his goals seem to be. And so one day, desperate to land a key sale at the end of a bad quarter, he seeks advice from the enigmatic Pindar, a legendary consultant referred to by his many devotees simply as the Chairman.

Over the next week, Pindar introduces Joe to a series of “go-givers:” a restaurateur, a CEO, a financial adviser, a real estate broker, and the “Connector,” who brought them all together. Pindar’s friends share with Joe the Five Laws of Stratospheric Success and teach him how to open himself up to the power of giving.

Joe learns that changing his focus from getting to giving—putting others’ interests first and continually adding value to their lives—ultimately leads to unexpected returns.

Imparted with wit and grace, The Go-Giver is a heartwarming and inspiring tale that brings new relevance to the old proverb “Give and you shall receive.”

3. The Infinite Game by Simon Sinek

How do we win a game that has no end? Finite games, like football or chess, have known players, fixed rules and a clear endpoint. The winners and losers are easily identified. Infinite games, games with no finish line, like business or politics, or life itself, have players who come and go. The rules of an infinite game are changeable while infinite games have no defined endpoint. There are no winners or losers—only ahead and behind.

The question is, how do we play to succeed in the game we’re in?

In this revelatory new book, Simon Sinek offers a framework for leading with an infinite mindset. On one hand, none of us can resist the fleeting thrills of a promotion earned or a tournament won, yet these rewards fade quickly. In pursuit of a Just Cause, we will commit to a vision of a future world so appealing that we will build it week after week, month after month, year after year. Although we do not know the exact form this world will take, working toward it gives our work and our life meaning.

Leaders who embrace an infinite mindset build stronger, more innovative, more inspiring organizations. Ultimately, they are the ones who lead us into the future.

4. The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson

This is the 8th Anniversary Edition of the popular book that outlines a way of thinking and a way of processing information that enables you to make the daily choices that will lead you to the success and happiness you desire. Learn why some people make DREAM after DREAM come true, while others just continue to spend their lives building dreams for someone else. It’s not just another self-help motivation tool or methods you must learn in order to travel the path to success.

The Slight Edge shows you how to create powerful results from the simple daily activities of your life, by using tools already within you. This new edition is completely re-edited, line by line and word by word. The authors took a few bits out, and added a whole lot more bits in. There’s an entirely new chapter called “The Secret of Happiness” (its core message is that success doesn’t lead to happiness — it’s the other way around) and another on the business of creating ripples on the pond of life and leaving a legacy. “We had the chance to say a whole lot we hadn’t quite said the first time ’round,” says John David Mann. “It was like getting to have a massive do-over. (How often does that happen in real life?!)It is, in other words, the same book … and at the same time an entirely new book.”

This edition of The Slight Edge will show you how to create life-altering dynamics—how a way of thinking, a way of processing information, can impact daily choices that will lead you to the success and happiness you desire. The Slight Edge is “the key” that will make all the other how-to books and self-help information that you read, watch and hear actually work.

5. Dave Ramsey’s Complete Guide to Money

If you’re looking for practical information to answer all your “How?” “What?” and “Why?” questions about money, this book is for you. Dave Ramsey’s Complete Guide to Money covers the A to Z of Dave’s money teachings, including how to budget, save, dump debt and invest. You’ll also learn all about insurance, mortgage options, marketing, bargain hunting and the most important element of all―giving.

Because this is the handbook for Financial Peace University, you won’t find much new information here if you’ve already taken the nine-week class. It also covers the Baby Steps Dave wrote about in The Total Money Makeover, and trust us―the Baby Steps haven’t changed a bit. So, if you’ve already memorized everything Dave’s ever said about money, you probably don’t need this book. But if you’re new to this stuff or just want the all-in-one resource for your bookshelf, this is it!

6. The Power of Moments by Chip Heath & Dan Heath

While human lives are endlessly variable, our most memorable positive moments are dominated by four elements: elevation, insight, pride, and connection. If we embrace these elements, we can conjure more moments that matter. What if a teacher could design a lesson that he knew his students would remember twenty years later? What if a manager knew how to create an experience that would delight customers? What if you had a better sense of how to create memories that matter for your children?

This book delves into some fascinating mysteries of experience: Why we tend to remember the best or worst moment of an experience, as well as the last moment, and forget the rest. Why “we feel most comfortable when things are certain, but we feel most alive when they’re not.” And why our most cherished memories are clustered into a brief period during our youth.

Readers discover how brief experiences can change lives, such as the experiment in which two strangers meet in a room, and forty-five minutes later, they leave as best friends. (What happens in that time?) Or the tale of the world’s youngest female billionaire, who credits her resilience to something her father asked the family at the dinner table. (What was that simple question?)

Many of the defining moments in our lives are the result of accident or luck—but why would we leave our most meaningful, memorable moments to chance when we can create them? The Power of Moments shows us how to be the author of richer experiences.

7. The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

Falling in love is easy. Staying in love—that’s the challenge. How can you keep your relationship fresh and growing amid the demands, conflicts, and just plain boredom of everyday life?

In the #1 New York Times international bestseller The 5 Love Languages, you’ll discover the secret that has transformed millions of relationships worldwide. Whether your relationship is flourishing or failing, Dr. Gary Chapman’s proven approach to showing and receiving love will help you experience deeper and richer levels of intimacy with your partner—starting today.

The 5 Love Languages is as practical as it is insightful. Updated to reflect the complexities of relationships today, this new edition reveals intrinsic truths and applies relevant, actionable wisdom in ways that work.

8. Atomic Habits by James Clear

No matter your goals, Atomic Habits offers a proven framework for improving–every day. James Clear, one of the world’s leading experts on habit formation, reveals practical strategies that will teach you exactly how to form good habits, break bad ones, and master the tiny behaviors that lead to remarkable results.

If you’re having trouble changing your habits, the problem isn’t you. The problem is your system. Bad habits repeat themselves again and again not because you don’t want to change, but because you have the wrong system for change. You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems. Here, you’ll get a proven system that can take you to new heights.

Clear is known for his ability to distill complex topics into simple behaviors that can be easily applied to daily life and work. Here, he draws on the most proven ideas from biology, psychology, and neuroscience to create an easy-to-understand guide for making good habits inevitable and bad habits impossible. Along the way, readers will be inspired and entertained with true stories from Olympic gold medalists, award-winning artists, business leaders, life-saving physicians, and star comedians who have used the science of small habits to master their craft and vault to the top of their field.

Learn how to:

  • make time for new habits (even when life gets crazy);

  • overcome a lack of motivation and willpower;

  • design your environment to make success easier;

  • get back on track when you fall off course;

…and much more.

Atomic Habits will reshape the way you think about progress and success, and give you the tools and strategies you need to transform your habits–whether you are a team looking to win a championship, an organization hoping to redefine an industry, or simply an individual who wishes to quit smoking, lose weight, reduce stress, or achieve any other goal.

9. Lucky Bitch by Denise Duffield-Thomas

Can you learn to be lucky? Don’t wait for the stars to align or until you ‘deserve’ outrageous success. Get ready to explore the infinite possibilities life has to offer and unleash your inner ‘Lucky Bitch’. In Lucky Bitch you’ll discover fun strategies behind the Law of Attraction to manifest the wealth you want, the love you deserve and the courage to go after the life of your dreams. Learn the inspirational story of how life coach Denise Duffield-Thomas used these powerful tools to attract more than half a million dollars worth of free travel, scholarships, prizes and bank errors in her favour. Lucky Bitch reveal the secrets of effortlessly successful women that can change your life forever, starting today!

10. The Five Second Rule by Mel Robbins

How to enrich your life and destroy doubt in five seconds.

Throughout your life, you’ve had parents, coaches, teachers, friends, and mentors who have pushed you to be better than your excuses and bigger than your fears. What if the secret to having the confidence and courage to enrich your life and work is simply knowing how to push yourself?

Using the science of habits, riveting stories, and surprising facts from some of the most famous moments in history, art, and business, Mel Robbins will explain the power of a “push moment”. Then, she’ll give you one simple tool you can use to become your greatest self.

It takes just five seconds to use this tool, and every time you do you’ll be in great company. More than eight million people have watched Mel’s TEDx Talk, and executives inside of the world’s largest brands are using the tool to increase productivity, collaboration, and engagement.

In The 5 Second Rule, you’ll discover it takes just five seconds to:

  • Become confident

  • Break the habit of procrastination and self-doubt

  • Beat fear and uncertainty

  • Stop worrying and feel happier

  • Share your ideas with courage

The 5 Second Ruleis a simple, one-size-fits-all solution for the one problem we all face – we hold ourselves back.

The secret isn’t knowing what to do – it’s knowing how to make yourself do it.

Top 10 Self-Development Books

I have loved the number 8 for most of my adult life, but more recently it’s shown me signs of prosperity, trust and wisdom I cannot ignore. I could go on and on about the freaky times 8 has popped up in my life, but I’ll spare you the very long list.

Numbers 108 and 808 are the ones that speak to me the most.


108 has special meaning in a number of ways but I stumbled on the significance of it through yoga training where I learned the Sanskrit alphabet has 54 letters. Each has masculine and feminine, shiva and shakti, 54 times 2 is 108. Boom.

In that training, one of my instructors introduced me to mala beads; the Indian Subcontinent rosary or set of mantra counting has 108 beads. Of course, I immediately ran out to Michael’s to buy beads to make malas (that whole hobby in to a job thing). I use my own mala beads as a meditation tool daily to keep me grounded and sober.


This one is perhaps a little more relatable and far closer to my heart. My dear friend Patty and I dream about the day we can meet in Hawaii. I learned from her that Hawaii’s area code is 808 and ever since I see 8:08 almost every day, am and pm; I have hundreds of screenshots to prove it. The other day I was at .88 miles on my walk at exactly 8:08am. It’s creepy.

From Numerology 8 Meaning: Universalism and Power By Megan Bryant | Updated on January 11, 2023 are so many ways the number 8 is associated with a continuous flow of energy and power, be it related to wealth, health, wisdom and prosperity.

“What does the number 8 mean in numerology?

Numerology 8 represents balance in the materialistic and spiritual world. The most important attribute of the number 8 lies in its shape. You can see in its symmetry that figure 8 is the symbol of cosmic balance and stability. Individuals associated with the number 8 tend to be efficient, confident, ambitious, and good leaders. They have a deep inclination to achieve success in their respective fields and believe in the significance of mind over matter. In numerology, the number 8 means five different things, which we’ll dive deep into below.

  • Balance and stability

  • Continuous cycle

  • Abundance and prosperity

  • Responsibility and the ability to make decisions

  • Personal power and strength of will

Balance and stability

The number 8 in numerology signifies balance and stability between the material and immaterial worlds. Like with the other single-digit numbers in numerology, the shape of the number 8 is an essential attribute in order to understand its meaning. Number 8 is composed of two full circles or rings side by side to make a symmetrical figure. Hence, number 8 is considered the Great Karmic Equalizer. In numerology, the number 8 is a force that can create as well as it can destroy. When the number 8 comes into your life, it’s a great sign that you will reap what you sow.

In addition, the symmetrical shape of the number 8 suggests evenhandedness and poise. It’s the picture of perfect balance. And this balance is an important factor when it comes to enduring challenges in life. The presence of numerology 8 represents stability in any aspect of life or situation.


In numerology, the number 8 means a continuous cycle. On its side, the number 8 becomes the infinity symbol, which signifies the continuous cycle between the beginning and the end. Hence, numerology 8 symbolizes a constant flow of power and energy. In other words, the number 8 represents everything that makes up the universe which is infinite: love, time, and energy.

Additionally, the number 8 is a connecting number representing the link between the earthly and the divine worlds.

Abundance and prosperity

Numerology 8 means smoothly flowing abundance and prosperity. More than any other number, the number 8 emphasizes abundance in all areas of life, particularly in career, business, and finances. In the material world, 8 focuses on the results in money form.

Moreover, the symbol of 8 lying down, which is infinity, is a magnet of abundance. It represents infinite wisdom and limitless potential to create abundance in whatever you desire. As long as you value and use the opportunities, abundance and prosperity will continue flowing in your life.

Responsibility and the ability to make decisions

The number 8 means responsibility and the ability to make important decisions in numerology. It’s the number with discipline, insight, efficiency, and authority. The number 8 possesses extraordinary willpower to take the reins. It commands respect and is always clear about the end goal.

Number 8 is its ability to face any storm and come out victorious. While it’s a number known for its luck and success, a key element in the number 8’s success is its ability to make hard decisions and deal with hardships when life gets tough.

Personal power and strength of will

The number 8 in numerology means power and strength of will. Its main principle is mind over matter, which teaches how to efficiently use the Law of Attraction when manifesting your desires. The number 8 is confident in its strength, skills, talents, and its ability to go out there and take what it desires.

In addition to its confidence, the number 8 represents mastery of your personal power. Oftentimes, people look up to the number 8 as the leader. When the number 8 appears, it’s a sign to use your personal power, drive, and leadership to draw what you desire into your life. Number 8 is a reminder that what you focus on will magnify.

Why is the number 8 special?

The number 8 is special for two reasons. First, the number 8 is a Fibonacci number. It’s the sixth number in the Fibonacci sequence and is the only number, besides number 1, that is a perfect cube. Second, the number 8 appears naturally all over the world and carries the vibrations of universal life. For example, there are eight major planets in the solar system. In the periodic table, the element with the atomic number of 8 is oxygen, something that life wouldn’t thrive without. Ideally, a human adult will have 8 teeth in each quadrant, and the 8th tooth is called the wisdom tooth. And on each side of a man and most mammals, there are 8 cervical nerves. In technology, there are 8 bits in a byte. In Mathematics, the geometric figure of the number 8 is the octagon, which is present in nature. For example, spiders have 8 legs, while octopuses and some jellyfish have 8 tentacles.

Is 8 a powerful number?

Yes, 8 is a powerful number. The number 8 is associated with power, strength, and authority, with key traits that include single-mindedness, good judgment, confidence, and executive skills.

In numerology, the number 8 is considered a number that’s ambitious and money-minded. People heavily associated with the number 8 often find themselves in positions of power and wealth.

Is 8 a master number?

No, number 8 is not a master number. In numerology, there are three master numbers: 11, 22, and 33. Master numbers make up the Triangle of Enlightenment. Numbers 11, 22, and 33 in numerology carry profound energies of vision, creation, and sharing.

The single-digit numbers are the core of numerology, but double-digits, like master numbers, hold all the power. Master numbers have a unique significance and carry double the vibration of the number it reduces to.

What does the number 8 mean spiritually?

Spiritually, the number 8 means three things. The first spiritual meaning of the number 8 is finding an energetic balance between the spiritual and physical world. Number 8 is equally materialistic and spiritual, representing destiny and karma. It brings us to the second meaning of the number 8, which is reward and fairness. Number 8 strongly resonates with karma and the old saying, “what goes around comes around.” Everything you put into the world will return to you in one form or another. In other words, your patience and hard work will pay off in the end. Lastly, 8 is a spiritual number that means inner stability. The number 8 symbolizes mental stability and a positive mindset, which signals a path toward spiritual enlightenment. When number 8 presents itself, you can expect something spiritual is happening or is about to happen because 8 has a strong connection with the spiritual or celestial world.

Overall, the number 8 is incredibly spiritual, and it holds strong spiritual symbolism. The number 8 signifies spiritual balance and symmetry, karma, and embracing personal power toward enlightenment.

What energy does 8 bring?

8 brings an energy that centers around focus, discipline, ambition, and drive. Those with the number 8 in their chart tend to be in leadership roles where they can excel with their powerful and focused energy. The 8 energy focuses on career, authority, material, and financial matters.

Is 8 a strong number in numerology?

Yes, 8 is considered a strong number in numerology because it beams with vibrations of strength and power to achieve your life goals. Number 8 is an achiever and has a deep inclination to achieve success.

That said, 8 is not the strongest number in numerology. The strongest and most powerful numbers in numerology are believed to be the master numbers, particularly the number 11. According to numerology, the master number 11 symbolizes strength, power, and determination.

What does an 8 house number mean?

An 8 house number means two things. First, house number 8 means wealth and harmony, according to Vastu Shastra. Vastu Shastra is an ancient Indian system that analyzes geometry, alignment, and balance in all things. House number 8 in Vastu promotes balance and growth in your personal and professional life. It’s the ideal residence if you want to live simultaneously with stability and satisfaction. According to Vastu, house number 8 is believed to help its owners have a stable family and financial independence. Second, house number 8 means endless health, wealth, and advancement opportunities, according to feng shui. Feng Shui is an ancient Chinese system that seeks harmony in spatial structure and elements. The number 8 represents the knowledge and spirituality area. In addition, the number 8 is one of the luckiest numbers in feng shui. House number 8 represents growth and abundance in wealth and wisdom.

What does year 8 mean in numerology?

In numerology, the year 8 means it is the time for self-empowerment. This year brings a startling realization that it’s up to you to regain and use your power to find the best way to live freely and happily in this world. Throughout year 8, you will prosper and experience abundance according to your strength and determination.

The manifestation of numerology 8 often means the last year was confusing and deeply emotional, but it brought out answers to your questions. And with the what’s and why’s in your life answered, year 8 in numero3logy is time to develop personal power. This year suggests a journey towards balance, achievement, and a deeper understanding of yourself.

According to numerology, you will feel powerful and dynamic during the 8th year. You will have plenty of opportunities to channel your inner power and direct your life however you want. Year 8 can be a year of great rewards or big disappointments, depending on the seeds you’ve sown the past year or how you step up.

It’s a demanding year that tests you in the realm of personal empowerment. That said, your ability to get things done and turn dreams into reality increases during year 8. In other words, year 8 in numerology challenges you to take the CEO role in your life. And it’s the year to get down to business.

Is 8 a lucky number?

Yes, 8 is a universal lucky number, especially in many Asian cultures. In China, the number 8 is considered an auspicious number as it is associated with money and wealth. They believe that the more 8s there are, the better luck it brings, especially in matters of business and money.

The number 8 is also lucky in Japan, but for reasons different from that in Chinese culture. It is considered lucky because if it’s turned to the side, 8 resembles the infinity or the “kanji” in Japan. The kanji symbolize prosperity and growth in Japanese culture.

In Korea, the number 8 is thought to bring money and good luck. Many Koreans try to book special events and celebrations like dates, weddings, or business meetings on dates with a lot of number 8 in it.

What does 8 mean in Chinese?

The number 8 means prosperity in Chinese. In Chinese Buddhism, figure 8 represents all the possibilities for a person and that something good will happen in the near future. Furthermore, the number 8, which is “Ba” in Chinese, has a similar pronunciation to “Fa,” meaning fortune or wealth.

According to feng shui, the number 8 on its side is the sign of infinity, which positively affects every space it’s located. Drawing this sign on a piece of paper and putting it inside a wallet attracts the energy of money and abundance. Feng shui further classifies the infinity sign as a symbol that harmonizes space and improves the chi energy inside the home.

The number 8 appears in many forms in Chinese culture because it symbolizes good luck. For example, the number 8 forms the intricate Chinese knot. A Chinese knot is a powerful amulet to attract Lady Luck and longevity.

What does the number 8 mean in Indian numerology?

In Indian numerology, the number 8 means intuitive intelligence. It’s a number that has the potential to achieve great things. According to Indian Vedic numerology, having the number 8 in your chart, birth date, or name means that you are an efficient, responsible, and energetic person. You love big challenges and always strive to be the best and the most successful in whatever you work on. Number 8 natives are visionaries who look beyond what’s in front of them or what’s happening in the present moment.

People associated with the number 8 have the talent and guts to make more than one fortune, according to Indian numerology. There may be many obstacles and financial failure along the way, but number 8 natives are true survivors.

Is 8 a karmic number?

Yes, 8 is a karmic number. In numerology, each letter represents a number from 1 to 9; any number missing from your name is your karmic lesson number. And karmic lesson number 8 indicates having exceptional potential for success and abundance. But remember that potential is only useful when harnessed and improved. Otherwise, the ability to attract money and prosperity in your life tends to slip through your fingers.

In other words, having a karmic number 8 means you have an equal chance of gaining something and losing it if you are not careful enough. Karmic lesson 8 encourages finding a balance between the desire to succeed and risk-taking. Knowing your limits, staying composed, and demonstrating caution will help you do well in business.

Is 8 a magic number?

Yes, 8 is a magic number because of its power and strength, which are often linked to money, luck, and prosperity. The magic of the number 8 in numerology is said to give you the power to achieve your life goals. The number 8 has a larger-than-life energy that gives abundance without limits.

However, the magical energy of the number 8 is difficult to harness. Discipline, persistence, and patience are essential to manifest your desires using the magic of the number 8.

What color represents the number 8?

Two colors represent the number 8. First, the number 8 is associated with the color grey, according to Vastu Shastra. Every direction has a corresponding planet, which is ruled by a specific number and color combination. The number 8 is associated with Shani or Saturn, which governs the West direction. As per Vastu, the ideal color for this corner is light grey. Second, the number 8 is associated with a very dark blue color, almost black, according to the hexadecimal color code.

Does the number 8 mean anything in astrology?

Yes, the number 8 means two things in astrology. First, the number 8 is connected to the Scorpio astrology sign. It’s the 8th astrological sign of the zodiac and features the same resolve and strength that the number 8 have. Second, the number 8 is associated with the astrological sign of Capricorn. Those born under the Capricorn zodiac sign share similar traits of the number 8, such as perseverance, ambition, and power.

What Planet Represents the Number 8?

The number 8 represents the planet Saturn. In astrology, the planet Saturn controls ambition, authority, career, and social environment. It has a slow-moving energy that provides the virtues of justice and patience.

Saturn has the face of a complex, ruthless, and cruel planet. It signifies hard work and teaches many life lessons through sorrow, pain, problems, setbacks, and hurdles. That said, the period of Saturn brings you to your real purpose in life.

What does the number 8 mean in the Bible?

The number 8 means a fresh start or a new beginning in the Bible. The number 8 played an integral part in different events in the Bible that signal creation or a new order. For example:

  • God saved 8 people in Noah’s Ark during the flood to have a new beginning for mankind: Noah, his wife, his three sons Shem, Ham, and Japheth, and their wives.

  • Boys were circumcised on the 8th day after birth, which represents the commitment to the covenant of letting God in their lives.

  • 8 is the number of Jesus who saved mankind from sins. The letters of his name in Greek add up to 888.

  • Jesus was crucified to bear the sins of the world but resurrected on day 17 of the month of Nisan in the Hebrew calendar. Nisan 17 comprises numbers 1 and 7, which equals 8. Furthermore, Nisan 17 is the 8th day since Jesus was singled out as the sacrificial lamb to die on the cross.

  • After his resurrection from the dead, Jesus showed himself alive 8 times.

Overall, the number 8 links to a brighter future for mankind. It’s the number of hope, resurrection, and spiritual regeneration.

What other numbers are most compatible with 8 in numerology?

In numerology, the number 2 (who is gentle, considerate, and loving) is most compatible with the problem-solver and a good provider number 8. The partnership between 8 and 2 plays well with their strengths and balances out their weaknesses.

On the other hand, the compatibility of numbers 3 and 8 makes them an ambitious duo, although misunderstandings arise if they’re not careful.

Below are the numbers that are most compatible with the number 8 in numerology.

1 and 8 compatibility in numerology

Number 1 and 8 compatibility, according to numerology, is instant. Both numbers are highly ambitious, motivated, and possess a strong drive to succeed. It’s no wonder that 1’s and 8’s will have an instant attraction to each other. Moreover, mutual attraction and respect will continue to fuel their romance because they can support each other in ways they need and bounce off ideas with each other. The partnership of 1 and 8 benefits each other’s success and ambition.

That said, the number 1 and 8 partnership is not the most passional or romantic one. They are too focused on their career and ambition. Still, they can depend on each other and feel mutual support and respect within the relationship.

2 and 8 compatibility in numerology

The number 2 and 8 is one of the most compatible numbers in numerology despite having poles apart characteristics. The number 8 has needs and demands for too much personal space, which makes the number 2 wait and adds to their fear of being alone.

That said, the differences between numbers 8 and 2 can complement each other to create a good balance. An 8’s strength in a relationship is taking care of the finances and providing for the family, while the 2’s inner strength is romantic and showering the other with love and affection.

3 and 8 compatibility in numerology

According to numerology, the numbers 3 and 8 are compatible and incompatible. The 3 and 8 are forces to be reckoned with when it comes to turning dreams into reality. The 8 is goal-oriented and ambitious, while the 3 is creative, imaginative, and energetic. Hence, the 3 and 8 make a good combination for starting projects or businesses.

That said, the 3 and 8’s approaches to life are at the opposite end of the spectrum. The number 8 is too disciplined and organized for the freedom-seeking and exuberant number 3, which is a recipe for misunderstandings. However, maintaining mutual respect for each other’s needs helps their relationship flourish.

Numerology 8 – Final thoughts

The number 8 represents balance and continuity in numerology. A numerology number of 8 describes a person who is ambitious and has the strength to continue in difficult times. The number 8 exudes positive energy and infinite possibilites.”

Article by © 2023 thecoolist.com – All Rights Reserved

A little story about purchasing the historical building located at 1909 Main Street in Cross Plains, Wisconsin.

I’ve never really written this story down, told it many times but never in quite the detail I’m about to. It’s quite personal and it’s a little woo woo so if you have a hard time believing in signs, visualization, manifesting or the power of stars aligning, you’ll probably want to scroll on by. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

Having sold real estate for a time in my twenties, browsing real estate has always been a passion of mine and when this property hit the MLS, I was, shall we say, intrigued.

Intrigued might be an understatement since I immediately filled out the form on Zillow to set up a showing. A huge no-no in the real estate world if you already have an agent you work with.*

Anyway, with my experience as an agent, I didn’t really need someone to show me around, I just needed the lockbox combo to get in but there are rules I guess. So, on a Saturday in September 2018, I was able to gain access to the building with the help of a nice, young Realtor.

Did I have a plan for said showing and building? No. Just an impulsive personality and an unexplainable pull to this historic property. Since I was a kid I had always wondered what the inside looked like and dreamed about what I could do with it so when the opportunity to walk through it presented itself, I didn’t hesitate. And I didn’t need a reason.

Just a month prior to this showing, Cross Plains experienced a “thousand-year flood”. It was devastating for our little community; houses and business with horrific damage, parking garages and basements flooded, homes destroyed. I was convinced that this vacant building, currently owned by the bank (foreclosure), was filled to the brim with water. (Remember, I worked in a bank for years so I understand a thing or two about when the bank “owns” a property. Let’s just say no banker was in the basement bailing out water with a bucket.)

I arrived at the showing to a guy fighting with the lockbox at the back door. Ya know when you can just tell when someone is out of their comfort zone? Poor thing had probably never been in a town of less than 30k people. While he fiddled around with that, I walked around the back. The gardens were overgrown but you could see the potential. When we finally got in the door, I put on my blinders and went straight for the basement. I know myself well enough that if I had one little peek of potential it was over so I needed to see how bad the water damage was before I got hooked.

The basement was BONE-DRY. Like not a drop of water anywhere or a hint of musty air. Just clean, bright and dry. How could this centuries-old building survive a thousand-year flood? I would come to find out it was just the first in a long line of stars that aligned.

I didn’t tell my husband I was going to look at it. That’s not totally surprising given our history, but “I was just looking” anyway. I also didn’t have the faintest idea what we would do with it or how on earth we would find the money to purchase it. But for the next few months it poked me.

Then, in February of 2019 the price dropped. Not significantly, but enough to ping my MLS feed activity. We were in Florida visiting my dad at the time; I remember being at the kitchen table when it came across, turned my screen in Dale’s direction, told him I already went to see it and the rest, they say, is history.

The next few weeks are somewhat of a blur but short and sweet:

  • This time I went to the listing agent for a showing. (Again, I’ll explain why in the footnote…this is not something an agent might suggest as you are not respresented as a buyer.)

  • We got off the plane and went straight to the showing where Dale does what he does; crosses his arms, goes silent thinking of possibilities and sometimes scratches his forehead with the brim of his hat. I knew right then he was on TEAM LFG.

  • I met with a loan officer.

    • A little backstory: my first job was with the bank that had the property in foreclosure and is our hometown bank. I went on to the website and happened to see that the grandson of the former president of the bank when I worked there was a commercial loan officer. Jackpot. I made an appointment, told Ben my ridiculous idea of opening a wine bar in this building and away we went.

    • Ben has now become our “dream banker”, where we dream up shit and he helps us make it happen.

  • We wrote an offer; low.

  • The listing agent, doing his job, called all those that had seen it before and told him, “let us know if someone writes an offer” which triggered a firestorm of competing offers.

  • We had to raise our offer and I wrote a “colorful” letter about how cool Dale and I were and how we would single-handedly make Cross Plains better with a wine bar.

  • Overnight, I wrote a business plan with LivePlan, secured a domain name, applied for an FEIN, created an LLC, a logo, business cards and started a Pinterest board. This is just who I am, I can’t help it.

  • After we did all that we could physically and professionally, I journaled. I wrote out a visualization dripping with gratitude on the day our offers were presented to the board of directors at the bank. It was the last thing I could think to physically “do” before I just had to let go and allow the Universe to work her magic. If it was meant to be it was meant to be.

The following is the visualization journal entry the day our offer was presented along with three competing offers:

“I don’t fear the outcome today.

I hope Kevin V {the real estate agent} has a good day – I know he will be busy and probably overwhelmed. Universe, please help guide him.

Our idea will allow me to use all of my skills to provide jobs, a place for people to feel comfortable laughing with friends, maybe shedding a tear and learning new things.

The space will allow me to shine through customer service, creativity, design, marketing and coming up with new ideas all the time.

I know the Universe will do what’s right for me. I am on a path that will allow me to open up all my doors to receive abundance.

I receive freedom in this endeavor as I will feel free to try new things.

I look forward to providing staff with a purpose and know that this will bring us closer together.

This will be the opportunity to put all my enlightening over the past few months to the test. All the work I’ve done up to this point is made for this opportunity.

I know the other offers out there are just to make sure we are serious about this.

I am so grateful for where I am right now. I feel comfortable in my own skin, I feel stronger mentally and physically than I can ever remember and I am confident this can work and I know it will be successful.

All the goals I have written down could be attained with this adventure.

I want to prove to myself that I can do it – the honest, authentic, right, brilliant way that I know I can.

I have been able to see clearly and I am so grateful for all the things that have happened so I may open my eyes to all the brilliance and beauty in this world.

I know that I am but a vessel sent here to awaken my true purpose; to provide inspiration for those that need it, to quit drinking, get healthy, try something new, start a business and ultimately live their most authentic lives.

My goal is not happiness because that comes and goes. My goal is that I can live true most of the time in my purpose:

  • To inspire

  • To give of my gifts

  • To share my gifts with the world

My gifts are:

  • Inspiring others

  • Compassion & Empathy

  • Creativity & Idea-building

  • Tenacity

While I can’t wait for spring, I recognize that Mother Nature is just giving us a little more time to straighten this out before we need to work outside. I am grateful for the extra downtime.

I know she will not let us down, I can hear the birds chirping so I know spring is on the way.

I grabbed my mug: “Gather here with a grateful heart”. I will hang this at Nineteen09 because that’s what I plan to provide; a place to gather with a grateful heart.


I can see myself unlocking the front door on a sunny warm mid-morning.

Blue bag strung across my body, coffee cup with tea in hand. Maybe I fluff the abundant flower pots on my way in.

I walk in to a clean, refreshing room filled with light and good, quiet energy. I set my bag and cup down on the white quartz island and set about turning the lights on.

I can tell the employee from the night before took extra time to straighten shelves, wipe down and clean floors.

I turn on the computer and look at last night’s sales, so grateful for the community that has contributed to our abundance.

I make a mental note of everyone that has visited and say a little thank you to them.

I grab my mug and bag and head upstairs to my office to start the business day.

I check on finances, social media and emails.

After I spend an hour or so there I go outside to tend to the flowers and patio.”

It worked. The offer was accepted in March 2019.

But we had another hurdle to get over: financing. We had to swallow so much pride (so much), check our egos at the door and ask for {financial} help. Not easy especially since we were turned down more than once, but in the end, no one gets through this life without a little help.

Side note here: looking back I realize we could have never done this without help and Dale and I have vowed to pay that forward. One of the things we are most excited about as we become more successful is the ability to help, financially or other, anyone that wants to pursue a dream. We want to be the ones to say yes. It’s our favorite.

Again, after we felt we did everything we could, I journaled. Gratitude journaling feels weird at the time, writing about being thankful for all that you have even though you don’t have it yet, but looking back on it 4 years later, it’s other-worldly.

I could write this about my experiences today almost word-for-word.

After acceptance, but prior to the financing approval:

“I am so grateful for the approval of the building and business loan we are receiving.

I am so grateful to be able to sit in my own office, enjoying the bright sunshine that is flowing through the windows and ceiling all around me.

I am so grateful for our guests that are sitting with their friends laughing and relaxing. They have chosen our place to share their company with.

I am so grateful for the photography community that has embraced our studio idea so that we may afford all office spaces for ourselves.

I am so grateful for my brain so that I may learn new things; about owning a building, three businesses and inspire others to do the same.

I am so grateful for Dale’s handy work and that heis eye for detail and work ethic has gotten the doors open in record time.

I am so grateful for my yoga practice for it has given me the mind space I need.

I am so grateful for the creative community for their willingness to teach classes and workshops in our new space.

I am so grateful for the bank and others for they are willing to take the risk with us and believe in our dream.

I am so thankful for the team of employees we have. Their dedication and loyalty to us and our guests is what keeps us as one of the top wine bars in Dane County.

I am so grateful for all the positive press we’ve received in magazine, the papers and online.

I am so grateful for my kids’ patence, help and willingness to participate. Their positive attitudes have made the process a pleasant experience.

I am so grateful for the abundance of money that give us the freedom and security I’ve never had before.

I am so grateful for my health and the clarity to learn lessons and receive all the good things this life is offering me everyday.

I am so grateful for friends that can recognize my talents and have faith that I will find my way in this world.

I am so grateful for all of the support for Nineteen09 already. We will be so successful which will be measured by a steady income, security and the energy in the room on any given day.

I am so grateful that the things I get to do for money doesn’t feel like a job.

I am so grateful that planting flowers and making the space look nice is just part of what I do now.

I am so grateful for the strengthened relationships this path has brought to me.

I am so grateful I am able to recognize all the gifts this life has to offer me.

I am so grateful for the people that have told me I have inspired them to do better when it comes to self-care.

I am so grateful I am no longer scared to stand in my truth.

My truth and authenticity is my best quality and if I remember that everyday I will never ever fail.

Failure is only a lesson to do better next time.

I am so grateful to be able to sit on this bed, have the time and the freedom to write.

I am so grateful sitting at the desk in my office being able to look back on the past few months and rejoice that it has all come together exactly as it should have.

I am grateful for the quiet.

I am grateful to have a full plate to keep me busy and my mind sharp.

I am grateful for Dale and his ability to see the big picture.

I am so grateful for my home, the green grass, even the snow which makes me even more thankful for the beautiful Wisconsin spring and summer days ahead.

I am so grateful for a boss that is happy for me.

I am so grateful I took the time to take a step back, clean out the clutter in my head and soul so that I was able to receive all of thse wonderful gifts that I have been able to look at as the miracles that they are.

I am so grateful for the genius minds that came up with Pinterest. The fuel that feeds my creative mind is so inspiring.

I am so grateful for the money that is coming my way and that it may teach me the value of my talents, ideas and worth.

I am so grateful for yoga and the way it makes me feel at peace. My body has changed and become so much stronger, lean and stable.

I am so grateful I have the knowledge to recognize my struggles but then give myself the grace to learn from them.

I am so grateful for the habits I have broken and the ability to practice rather than just everything being black and white.

I am so grateful for all of the support we have received about the building so far and how much we are about to receive.

I am so grateful I will have a place to work and call my own.

I am so grateful for all of our guests and customers that are willing to spend their hard-earned money with us.

I am so grateful for my kids and their willingness to come along on this adventure.

I am so grateful for the amazing artists that allow me to buy their creations to make others happy.

I am so grateful to the Universe for giving me and the people around me the talents and faith to bring these dreams together.

I am so grateful for all of the ideas that others have offered as suggestions for the business.

I am so grateful for finishing the 90 days alcohol-free because it gave me the confidence to do be able to do it again.

I am so grateful for the coffeeshop as it’s provided me a place to work and connect.

I am so grateful to have faith in the not-yet-seen.

I am so grateful for Dale’s talents to help bring this dream in to reality.

I am so grateful I had the courage to stand in my truth.

I am so grateful for the vulnerability and humbleness I was allowed to share with so many.

I am so grateful for all the amazing lessons I have learned to bring me to this very day.

I am so grateful for the feeling of anxiety because it lets me know something is not right.”

We worked like dogs for 83 days straight in order to open the doors to Nineteen09 on July 18th, 2019. It was a perfect, friggin’ hot, day to open the door to a dream. The dream was not so much to open a bar, but to create a space.

That space opened the door to another space, then another, then another and more to come.

Reading this over again, it’s hard to believe it was written in March 2019. Every single thing I was grateful for then stands true today.

Update: In July 2023, we sold the Nineteen09 business to our dear friends Cassie and Tyler Ballweg.  We kept the building as we just couldn’t let it go yet.


*Working with another real estate agent while you already have one, or even if you don’t, causes an issue if the purchase goes to closing. There is something called “procuring cause” meaning if you work with an agent to see a property and the agent has done some work with you, they may be entitled to the commission even though you already work with someone else. Keep this in mind if you are shopping around for property. Loyalties and who’s working for who can get blurry.

* We decided to work with the listing agent, knowing full-well that he was ‘working for the seller’. The listing agent is bound legally to work to get the best situation for the seller, NOT the buyer. I decided to do this for a couple of reasons:

  1. I was confident in my skills as a former agent

  2. This was a foreclosure so while the bank needs to get out from “under water;” they are not in the business of selling or holding on to real estate.

  3. The bank has no emotional ties to the property so I didn’t see the need for a buyers’ agent to help negotiate.

My yoga journey has been a long one with lots of pit stops along the way.

In my early twenties, I ‘tried’ a yoga class. Mainly because I wanted that lean yoga bod. I wasn’t yet ailing from achy bones and joints yet and a hangover was pretty much non-existent in those early years, so early Saturday morning classes were no biggie.

But, I didn’t like it. Blasphomy, I know. I always left there feeling queasy and with a dull headache (it couldn’t possibly have been from the 8 beers and bottle of wine I had 7 hours before). So I ditched it. Plus, I wasn’t ‘good’ at it so no more yoga for me.

Fast forward to my thirties after my love/hate relationship with running started. I trained for and completed a 10k, half-marathon and marathon in under a year before my thirtieth birthday and then 10 months later had my first baby. If there was ever a body that needed the healing nature of yoga, it was this one.

I ‘tried’ yoga again. We lived in a small town in northern Wisconsin at the time and while I wanted nothing more to embrace the hippie dippy vibe of this class, I just couldn’t do it…again. The instructor bugged me and I left with another headache after we did 15 minutes of “eye yoga” which consisted of rolling our eyes. I’m already so good at that.

After a move back to our hometown, I returned to my traditional fitness classes; cycling, BodyPump, running, lifting heavy things, etc., even going through instructor training to teach said classes. Then my second baby came. I taught and attended BodyPump classes all the way up until my 38th week, because I thought that made me a badass. It didn’t.

For the next eighteen months I suffered through sciatica, piriformis syndrome, (which was bad enough to warrant sleeping on a tennis ball most nights), groin pain and all around mother-of-two under three fatigue.

In the meantime, I had taken a new job at the gym I was working at in our Wellness Studios as the “front desk girl”. It was such a different vibe from the hustle and bustle of the main gym where the weight room, fitness classes and pools were located. My little reception desk was directly across from a massage and aromatherapy spa so the smell in that place was amazing. The place has 5 studios for yoga, hot yoga, pilates, barre and tai chi.

Much. Different. Vibe.

In my never-ending quest to lose weight (all of it, but the baby weight first), my director said, “try some hot yoga. That weight will just slip right off.” Wait, what? I had never heard of yoga as a method for weight loss. In the volumes of articles and books and posts I consumed since I packed on the pounds, yoga had never been mentioned as the solution to my weight problem.

(Um, I know why now.)

But, the mere mention of this from someone who clearly knew what she was talking about; she was in her late forties and could pass for a 20-something, who was I to argue?

So, I bought myself an expensive mat, a new big-girl yoga outfit, a shiny waterbottle and dragged my fat ass to my first hot yoga class.

While I think I might have gone in and out of conscienceness more than once during that sixty minutes, the last 5 were enough to get me to come back. Again and again and again.

After about 6 months, and still the same weight I was when I started, that director offered me a free ticket in to Level 1: YogaFit Foundations training. A yoga instructor? Me? No way.

I mean I love to teach, but I felt like an imposter; I don’t have a “yogi” bod, I don’t meditate in my shrine every day and I love to eat meat. Plus, I had only been “practicing” (if that’s what you could call it; more like trying not to die for 55 minutes followed by 5 minutes of bliss) for less than a year.

But it was free and someone I respected offered this opportunity to me so not wanting to be ungrateful, I went for it.

I finished Level 1 with no major incident, continued through Anatomy and Alignment within a few months.

And then I stopped.

For the next 5+ years I practiced/didn’t practice; determined to make a habit out of it only to let insecurities and imposter syndrome get the best of me.

Plus, drinking a box of shitty wine every few days wasn’t doing me any favors. Yes a box. And yes, every few days.

In January 2019, I made a decision to take that crappy habit out of my life for 90 days. It opened ALL THE DOORS. I committed to my practice every single day for those 90 days. I’d never felt better in my life.

There’s an entire story behind this 90 days, but to make a long story short, 90 days was not enough. I recommitted to my practice and finished Level 2 in October 2019, Level 3 in July 2020 and will attend Level 4 in August.

While teaching fills my desire to share my knowledge of yoga with the rest of the world, the education deepens the commitment to my own practice and self-discovery.

Much better than an empty glass of pinot grigio.

A few years ago, my very talented husband finally gave in to my whining and built out our attic into a seed starting space. I start around 10K seeds every year for our cut flower farm and since I’m too lazy to trudge down to the shed, the space off of our master bathroom above our garage became my little seed sanctuary.

Of course Dale won’t do anything half-assed, so this place is complete with ship lap walls, luxury vinyl plank floors and white quartz shelving and countertops. It even has a Solatube skylight.

It’s nicer than any other room in the house. For real.

After a couple of years starting seeds and then leaving it in shambles for the summer, I decided to transform it in to a yoga and meditation space just for me in the off-season.

This is what we refer to as shambles.

This is what we refer to as shambles.

You may not have a dedicated space like this, but let’s be real, it is an attic above the garage right next to our master bathroom toilet. And our master bathroom is not fit for a master…more like a jester. So, it is possible.

It didn’t really take all that much to make the space comfortable, relaxing and inviting; a little elbow grease and a few yoga and meditation essentials I found around the house. I even had a little helper and all it cost me was a unicorn kid’s yoga mat.

Here’s what you might want for a yoga and meditation sanctuary to start an at-home practice:

  • Space. It doesn’t need to be much bigger than the size of a yoga mat. Wherever that space might be for you; on the floor at the end of your bed, in the hallway, the basement, your balcony, try to roll out your mat in the same spot every session. Allow it to become a ritual. It might take a few tries to find the right space; have patience.

  • A Yoga Mat. The four corners of your mat and what’s within them is really all you need to start and commit to an at-home yoga practice. If you need a few suggestions, below are links to a few of my favorites.

  • Speaker or Device. Music is important to set the tone or mood of your yoga or meditation practice. This can be anything from an old record player with your favorite vinyl or your brand new shiny iPhone. Note: If it is the device you’re chained to all day long, promise me you’ll put it in Do Not Disturb mode for the duration of your practice. We have enough squirrels running around in our heads to have to wrestle with the ding of an FB notification too.

  • Music, Podcast or Recording. If you plan to actually do yoga in your space (sometimes setting it up is as far as I get), find a yoga recording or podcast you enjoy. Again, this might take some trial and error, so keep trying until you find the right fit. After the pandemic, there should be no shortage of virtual and/or online options to choose from. Below are a few of my favorites.

  • Props. Depending on what kind of practice you’re starting, you might want a few accessories to make your practice more comfortable or accommodating.

    • A strap and a simple block can work wonders in deepening stretches, aligning poses properly and increasing strength. Bolsters are handy for support in a meditation, yin or restorative practice.

  • Water Bottle. I’m a sucker for a cute water bottle (I may or may not have a problem) so ignore me if you’re happy drinking out of a regular glass. Of course, any water container will do but I find it so much easier to drink water if it comes in gets delivered in a cute vehicle. Just make sure you have it, however you drink it.

  • Plants. I’m a flower farmer, so forgive me if I marry two of my passions here. I would argue no studio is complete without some plant life. There are so many varieties of houseplants; some that don’t need any light at all to thrive. Studies have proven that plants can reduce stress and boost your mood so I don’t think you need additional reasons. Save a little water in that cute bottle and give your plant a drink after every session. Voila.

  • Lighting. No need to get fancy here, unless you can. Just like music, lighting is important in setting the tone of our space. A simple candle in a dark room may be all you need. If sunlight is important, consider setting up your space next to a south-facing window or even outdoors if poosible.

  • Aromatherapy. Knowing how scent can impact your mood gives you the opportunity to use it to your advantage. If you’re looking to unwind, you’ll want to focus on scents which contain Lavender. Need a pick me up? The scent of citrus can make you feel more awake, productive and calm. Essential oil diffusers are great but a candle will do too. And nothing is better than fresh lemon slices or lavender from the garden.

  • Mists. End your practice with a cool body mist. Simply tap a couple drops of essential oil or lemon juice in to a small spray bottle and mist away.

Pick and choose from this list or just build on it when you can.

While cute “things” can be fun, the only thing you’ll ever need is your body, your breath and your willingness to move.

Much better.

Much better.

A few of my favorite things:

How to create a yoga sanctuary.png

My experience with a yoga class starts days before I even go. I start thinking about a Monday morning class on Saturday. I find reasons not to go; I’m too fat, too out of shape, too tired, too busy, too whatever.

But then I catch myself and think, this isn’t very nice of me to say to myself. So, instead I move in to I am going to smell bad or what if an untimely bodily sound escapes me while I am in down dog, or what if I try a balance pose and then can’t do it, thereby falling in to my yogi neighbor? This little episode goes on for a few minutes until some other thought or task enters my mind.


After what likely is a full weekend of drinking, Sunday night rolls around. I am closer to actually making the decision to go by registering for the class online, as a punishment for said-weekend. This is the part where I start thinking about all the other things I have to do INSTEAD of go to yoga tomorrow. Like the dishes, the laundry, the work emails, the kids’ schedules, pretty much anything else that will give me an out.

No. Stop it. I am going. (Because, let’s be real, those “instead of” things don’t get done anyway.)

Monday morning chaos ensues;

Me: Where’s your backpack?
Me: I didn’t wear your shoes last.
Me: Do you or do you not want chocolate chips on your pancakes?
Me: Yes, we will go to the library this afternoon. (Probably not.)
Me: Did anyone let the dogs out?
Me: Yes, you have basketball practice tonight.
Me: Yes, you have to brush your teeth.

Kiss, kiss, kiss.
Love you, love you, love you.

Sound familiar? Guessing it’s like every other All-American household at 7:15am on a Monday morning.

Now, here I am, standing alone in my messy house surveying the damage from the weekend; a pile of dirty dishes and a full, clean dishwasher (< the worst), loads of dirty and clean laundry, by now intermingled (<< also the worst) and a red, number-filled circle above the mail app on my phone (<< I hate the red circles).

But, lucky for me, I hate chores more than my excuses, so I 5-4-3-2-1 myself to put on my “workout” yoga pants (I have my “pajama” yoga pants on) and get my ass out the door.

Here’s where the shit gets real. I happen to work at this health club, so on my way in the door I see ten people I know that are most certainly thinking to themselves, “Oh my God, I haven’t seen her in forever.” Except this time, they actually do say it out loud and now I feel like a real loser because I HAVEN’T been here in forever. This little sentiment is only coupled with the fact that my staff pass has expired, which means I haven’t been to A class in over a year.

I get it Universe; we’ve established the fact that I haven’t been here in a long time. You can move on from this now.

I quickly take my coat and hat off, which in and of itself is an act of bravery because ever since I chopped all of my hair off, I am stuck in short hair purgatory; too short to pull up, too long to be cute when wet and sweaty. I wake up every morning looking like a goat has been licking my head all night long.

I run for the darkness of the studio and of course, expecting that MY spot, in the back corner by the stereo where no can see me, has been reserved for the past 12 months. But, no. It has been stolen right out from underneathe me.

I frantically scan the room looking for more corners, but they are all taken. Ok, here, in front of this pillar, this will work. I roll out my shitty Costco mat and lay down on my back. Phew. If you knew how much energy and self-loathing it took to get here, you’d consider this a major accomplishment too.

I try to relax and focus. Try to push my insecurities aside while I “breathe in to it.” Ha. Except I am so fucking worried that my tampon is going to shift around in down dog, I can’t help but do Kegels. (TMI?)


Be grateful for the warmth of the heat lamps because it’s November and it’s freezing outside. Wait, did I turn my coat around when I hung it up so no one sees that it’s a size XXL?

Stop…just breathe.

The instructor turns up music and the lights (damn it) and I know we are about to get started. Too late to run for the door now. She asks us to set an intention for class, which has been the same one since I started practicing yoga 3 years ago; “don’t look at the clock”. Simple I know, but this is a serious problem for me. I can ruin a perfectly lovely class by seeing that it’s only 8:45am in an 8:30am class. But, today, I added on “let my self-judgement go”.

I pull my big girl pants up and start moving with the rest of the class, trying like hell not to worry about my cleavage or my stomach or my fat arms or my unruly hair or my red face or my slippery mat. And, right on cue about fifteen minutes in, I am already sweating and breathing so hard I can’t think of anything else anyway.

Mission accomplished.

I make it through the entire class (because what other choice did I have?) relatively unscathed to my favorite part: savasana. No squeakers, which of course was my biggest fear of all. Yes, my hair looks like shit, my face is beet red, my pants have fallen below my gut and I couldn’t hold my tree pose as long as the 65-year-old man next to me. But, I’m laying there, feeling my pulse against my bones, my bones against the earth, my breath moving in and out of my lungs and I am thankful I came.

And, here’s the kicker, I’m not thinking about what I look like. As a matter of fact, I start thinking how sad it was that I had all those fears that almost stopped me from coming. The thought crosses my mind about how much energy it took to think all of those things about myself.

Then, I go a little deeper.

So, I just spent all of this time worrying about how I look to everyone else…what if they are too? What if they woke up feeling insecure, or bloated, or hairy or stinky? It occurs to me I didn’t look around at one of my yogi neighbors in that class, which probably means they weren’t looking at me either. I couldn’t tell you who was there, what they were wearing, how their hair looked or if their pants had fallen below their belly.

And that’s just the superficial, surface crap.

What about all of the other things that take up the precious space in our minds; babies, baking, Barbies, college, camps, cravings, spouses, soccer, spaghetti, parents, pets, parties, pantries. The list could go on forever.

And, it does.

Sometimes I like to sit in my ivory tower and tell other people: “who gives a fuck what other people think of you?” And, here I was, freaking out about who gives a fuck about me.

Let’s flip this story on it’s head, shall we?

If I saw someone I hadn’t seen in a while, attending a class they used to come to, I’d probably say the same thing, “I haven’t seen you in forever”. And, just like those that said it to me, it would come from a place of good intention; it’s ACTUALLY good to see you. And, then I would probably go back in to my own world of endless chatter.

The truth is this, and this may be hard to hear: NO ONE CARES ABOUT YOU AS YOU MUCH AS YOU THINK THEY DO. They just don’t. Everyone is so wrapped up in their own worlds, with overwhelming plates of things to do, say and give, they just don’t have the time or energy to worry about your belly.

But, how fucking awesome is that? We don’t need to worry about what other people worry about. We can just stay in our own lane, do the next healthy thing for ourselves.

So, what does this mean for you? It means find a place deep down to just get out the door. Get on your mat. Go for a run. Pick up a guitar. Write a paragraph. Sing a tune.
Try it.
You might hate it.
But you might not.

If it’s not yoga, find something you think you might, eventually, someday, maybe a long time from now, love. Something that might scare you just a little bit, and do it.

Something that you admire in someone else is a great place to start.

The insecurities and doubts and fear will be there. Push through them. I promise you will never regret the things you did, only the things you didn’t.

I know you think you can’t, but actually you can.

As I make an attempt to write everyday, some things just come up without a whole lot of effort, while other days I feel like I have to find a way to make doing laundry sound interesting.

Today was one of those days that I have the subject, it just makes me a little more vulnerable.

Vulnerable is sort of my jam these days.

One of the things that has plagued me since starting “this” (I don’t even know what to call it anymore), and LOOOONG before, is the fear of judgement.

Maybe you can relate?

At first it was the fear that people were going to judge how I had gotten here. Then it was the judgement of my writing style and how people would receive it. After that came the opinions of how I was doing this; starting a blog and airing it out for all the world to read. And now it’s the fear that if I try something new someone will roll their eyes at that too.

Judgement is a subject I have become an expert on preaching about. If you were sitting across from me at my kitchen counter worried about what someone else would think about what you were doing, I am the first one to pound in to your head it’s none of anyone else’s business.

I would go on and on about how no one has to live your life but you. And, that you have to make the best decision for your family. No, it doesn’t matter what your parents are going to think, or how your co-worker is going to feel or if it makes someone else uncomfortable. You have one life, do everything you can, life is short, carpe diem and all that shit.

You do you. Period.

But, here I sit worrying about what someone might think about what I am doing or about to do; if I try something new is someone going to think I can’t stick to something for very long? Is someone else going to think that I couldn’t possibly have time to “do it all”? Is someone out there thinking I am selfish or that I’m not a good mom or wife or friend? Am I an imposter?

It’s exhausting.

And then, after I get all of that out, I can take an honest look at it and preach away.

Rather than be vague and beat around the bush about this, I’ll tell you what I’m thinking and I am going to honestly list all of the things that are currently holding me back. Judge away.

Goal: Yoga Teacher Training: three week intensive course in June.


  • It’s too expensive

  • I don’t know that much about yoga

  • I have only just started practicing again

  • I won’t be a good teacher

  • What will I do with my kids?

  • I’m don’t have a “yogi” body

  • Who will let out the dogs?

  • It’s irresponsible to take three weeks off of life to take the course

  • Who do I think I am?

  • I’m too old to start this

  • What if I get bored of it in two years?

  • Am I biting off more than I can chew?

I am not going to let these fears win though.

(In actuality, I rarely do. I sort of do whatever I want anyway so to sit here and worry about it really doesn’t do anything but waste time.)

I wanted to write this out today because it’s been in my head for too long. And, when I get it out, it’s easy for me to “look at myself across the table” and lecture that fearful person.

Here’s what I’d tell her:

  • It’s too expensive – You can find the money. If you want it bad enough, you’ll find something in your budget to cut out to come up with it or the Universe will find it for you.

  • I don’t know that much about yoga – Yeah, idiot, that’s why you’re going to TRAINING.

  • I have only just started practicing again – Right…perfect timing.

  • I won’t be a good teacher – How do you know you won’t be a good teacher? Have you taught yoga before? No. Dumb excuse.

  • What will I do with my kids? You’ll ask for help and where you can’t get help, you’ll pay for it. It’s called day care…maybe you’ve heard of it?

  • I’m don’t have a “yogi” body – Can you do yoga? Yes? Then you have a yogi body.

  • Who will let out the dogs? See above re: kids.

  • It’s irresponsible to take three weeks off of life to take the course – Really? Irresponsible? Is it? I bet you’re going to have everything done before you go, plus, for Christ’s sake, you’re right down the road. And, it’s not like you’re going on a three week trip to Vegas to snort cocaine and blow your savings on slot machines. You’re going to YO-GA training.

  • Who do I think I am? You’re someone who wants to learn something new and better yourself in the process.

  • I’m too old to start this – You’re 40, not dead. Dead is too old.

  • What if I get bored of it in two years? What would happen? Nothing.  That’s what would happen.

  • Am I biting off more than I can chew? – You’ve definitely bitten off more than you can chew before…and you’ll do it again. And if it’s too much, quit. And when you’re too scared to quit, we’ll sit here and do this fun exercise all over again.

And, I’d totally be that snarky and mean about it.

And, my friends, that’s the fun shit that goes on inside my head on any given day…sometimes for days at a time.

However, it is one of my favorite things to do, so if you have something you want to do and have a laundry list of excuses like I do, I’d be happy to throw them back in your fac any time..

And, now I guess I’m applying for Yoga Teacher Training.

+ show Comments

- Hide Comments

add a comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

starting on your own
hero's journey

mini-course enrollment

Learning how to develop your own hero's journey can be a profound experience for a high-achieving woman like yourself. It offers a unique opportunity to embark on a journey of self-discovery and growth tailored to your life's narrative. By delving into the hero's journey framework, you can uncover valuable insights about your own journey—recognizing the challenges you've faced, celebrating your triumphs, and pinpointing moments of transformation. This mini-course serves as a powerful tool for taking stock of your experiences, goals, and dreams, empowering you to navigate your path with clarity and purpose. Through introspection inspired by the hero's journey, you can tap into your strengths, confront obstacles head-on, and embark on a transformative quest toward greater fulfillment and success.

i write therefore i am.

Hi, I'm Katy.
Your lifestyle designer and business mentor.

Writing is my way of unwinding and letting my thoughts roam free. Every so often, in the midst of this creative chaos, something clicks, and I'm like, "Hmm, maybe someone else will dig this too." So, I toss it out into the world, hoping it lands with someone who gets it.
I hope that's you.

Learn more

In a world that continually celebrates the achievements of women breaking through glass ceilings, climbing corporate ladders, and excelling in their chosen fields, it's easy to assume that these high-achieving women have it all together.  Read more.

The Struggle of High-Achieving Women

balancing success and everything else