Day 54: The Dragon Boats

We agreed today that this vacation has seemed longer thanall the week-long ones we’ve taken in the past. Probably because we can remember all of it.

That’s funny, but real true.

We headed to a beach on a lake today only to make a quick reversal after it was packed with Dragon Boat racers.  Yes, that’s a real thing.  It was okay though, we had a lovely day at the pool.

While this vacation has been amazing on many levels, it has also proven to be my biggest non-drinking challenge yet.  I have come up against some pretty deep-seeded emotional triggers that have forced me to take a good long look at my boundaries, or lack thereof.

I think it’s enough to say that so that I am reminded when I come back to read this and that I still stay respectful to the people love.  Sorry to be cryptic.

We all have things that trigger emotions that seem insurmountable; I am no exception.  And while I have dealt with these things many, many times before, and not very well, I think I have come to a point where I must set some boundaries around my values and the things I believe in.

I was meant to come up against those dragon boats today.

Time to slay.

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Playing small is sneaky. It sounds like, “I don’t need to make that much money” or “I’ll be happy if I just hit six figures.” It’s downplaying your expertise so you don’t seem like a know-it-all, or saying yes to projects that drain you because you don’t want to seem picky. For years, I thought shrinking back made me safe, likable, easy to have around. But it didn’t—it just kept me stuck in a box that was way too small for me.

For years, my work ethic was so tied to my identity I couldn’t see where one ended and the other began. I wore the grind like a badge—until I realized it was quietly erasing me.

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